The Evil Dead Confederate

My god is it boring at work today. I know I sound like a broken record every time I say that, but yeesh. This is getting ridiculous. I saw a job posting in craigslist yesterday for an "administrative assistant" position that starts out more than I'd make as a first year teacher. All they really ask is for someone proficient in Office programs, which I am, someone with a bachelor's degree, which I've got, and someone who is willing to put in overtime, which I've been doing for the past year and a half straight. It's definitely something to look into, I s'pose. Especially since dick sucking wasn't listed. We all know what's really expected of some of these admin assists.

Speaking of the job, I find it rather humorous that simply because I wear glasses and I've a penis, the people around me automatically assume I know a lot about computers. Fact is, I know 2 things about computers: Jack and shit. And Jack just left town. I have them all fooled, though. Either I do the tried and true "turn it off and turn it back on" trick (thank you The IT Crowd), or I fiddle around, open a bunch of various windows, type in a bunch of nonsense commands, and state that the problem is beyond me and it's something for the IT guys to screw with. Why go through all the trouble? Well, it's a great way to waste time and pave over a little of the day's doldrum. Also, I can't stand not knowing how to do something. I'm one of those people who always feels the need to know how to fix everything. Not in a know-it-all-I-wish-you-harm-you-annoying-piece-of-shit way, but more like a here-I-come-to-save-the-day way. I suck, I know.


Less like this


Way more like this

Let's talk music.



I've been finding myself less and less inclined to write about music. Quite frankly, Mr. Shankley, I'm sick of it. I usually go through these periods where I just hate music and stop listening to anything new. A few years will go by and I'll start discovering all of these great bands I've missed during my boycott, thus re-establishing my faith in music until I start getting sick of it again. It's a twisted, love/hate/love cycle. However, I just recently got a hold of the new Dead Confederate album, "Wrecking Ball" (not to be confused with the Emmylou Harris album). Not too bad. I actually like it a lot. It's damn fine for a first LP and it harkens back to the 90's rock heyday. In fact, there are quite a few times the singer sounds like Cobain backed by a touch of Afghan Whigs. In a good way. The whole thing has kind of a sexy swager to it. It's definitely the kind of record one can make sweet lovin' to. None of this is really all that surprising seeing as they're an Athens band and Athens is the only town in Georgia I can stomach. We really need good, old-fashioned heavy guitar rock to come back. It's nearly 2010, so there's the 20 year mark for the next retro decade to come back, in this case the 90's. Let's hope those wonderful indie rock bands come back with it. Songs I look forward to hearing every time I put the CD on are "The Rat," "Goner," and "All the Angels."

Upon searching for the track listing for the album (because I've got a wicked terrible memory), I found this little gem on Amazon:



It's called "Curse of the Cannibal Confederates" AKA/ "Curse of the Screaming Dead." It was made in 1982 and I must own it. You can pretty much bet your cute little hienies I'll be writing about it. Upon further research, I discovered that the director, Tony Malanowski, is also responsible for movies called "Nightmare Sisters" and "Dr. Alien." Oh, hells yes. I hope they're terrible.

I promise I'll write about Star Wars soon. I feel obligated because I brought it up a couple of posts back, but mainly because I really want to. Videos games, Clone Wars, old pictures I came across while packing of me as a 5-year old Vader from way back in Halloween 1980. Man, I could go on and on and believe me, I will.

[Later Edit] This just in!!!! I just saw in my new issue of Game Informer (the one with boring ass Halo on the cover. That's right, I said boring) that there is some kind of special 20th anniversary Mystery Science Theatre 3000 just released. I have no clue what it is, but I'm actually vibrating with excitement and anticipation!!!!!